A Really Good Lawyer Goofy Stuff / Back Home
Thanks to Ray for sending this one!
Part of rebuilding New Orleans caused residents
often to be challenged with the task of tracing home titles back potentially
hundreds of years. With a community rich with history stretching back over
two centuries, houses have been passed along through generations of family,
sometimes making it quite difficult to establish ownership. Here's a great
letter an attorney wrote to the FHA on behalf of a client:
You have to love this lawyer........
A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan would
be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being
offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took
the lawyer three months to track down. After sending the information to the FHA,
he received the following reply.
(Actual reply from FHA):
"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note
that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the
able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must
point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property
back to 1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to
clear the title back to its origin."
Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
(Actual response):
"Your letter regarding title in Case No.189156 has been received. I note that
you wish to have title extended further than the 206 years covered by the
present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country,
particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana
was purchased by the United States from France in 1803, the year of origin
identified in our application. For the edification of uninformed FHA
bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from
France, which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain . The land came
into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a
sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of
seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Queen Isabella. The good
Queen Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the
FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold
her jewels to finance Columbus 's expedition. Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may
know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly
accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that
God also made that part of the world called Louisiana. God, therefore, would be
the owner of origin and His origins date back to before the beginning of time,
the world as we know it, and the FHA. I hope you find God's original claim to be
satisfactory. Now, may we have our damn loan?"
The loan was immediately approved.