Yesterday, with things being a little boring, Sharon asked why I didn't do something useful with my time. She suggested I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the guys.  I did this and when I saw her the next day, I told her that I had joined a parachute club.   She said, "Are you nuts?  You're 75 years old and you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?" I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card. She said to me, "You idiot, where are your glasses! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club!" I'm in trouble again and don't know what to do...I signed up for five jumps a week! Life as a senior citizen is not getting any easier.